Mountain Musings


Eat It


Given the lack of diversity of fast food joints on this mountain – currently, mostly burgers and Mexican fare – I got to thinking about it and came up with a few ideas of my own regarding what might be suitable for the vacant lot on the corner of Lake Drive and Forest Shade Road in the heart of the Lake Gregory Village shopping district.


If I had the money and inclination to start such an enterprise at this high traffic corner, I’d do it myself, but I don’t, so never mind that. But someone else might be willing to invest in what would seem to be a popular and profitable venture.


The size of this prime lot precludes any sort of sit-down fare due its lack of space for parking, so a drive-through would seem to be the only realistic alternative. I know what you’re thinking – In-N-Out. Sorry, there are already several burger joints in the immediate vicinity, not to mention that In-N-Out is not about to put one of its outlets anywhere else than at the end of a freeway off ramp. And besides that, who needs ‘em when we’ve already got The A Burger across the street? Hopefully, they will reopen again someday. Speaking of fast food, you know what’s really weird? Weird Al Yankovic, that’s what!


“I don’t care if you’re full, just eat it, eat it, eat it, open up your mouth and feed it. Have some more yogurt, have some more Spam, it doesn’t matter if it’s fresh or canned, just eat it, eat it, eat it. Don’t you make me repeat it,” (“Eat It” – Weird Al Yankovic – 1984)


My first suggestion is a “bonafide” Popeye’s Fried Chicken outlet because there hasn’t been a decent fried chicken joint in these parts since Pioneer Chicken set up shop in Blue Jay back in the ‘80s. And, as Adam Sandler says, “Popeye’s is the schiznit.” I have another bright idea: How about a Popeye’s where Burger King used to be just outside the entrance to Lake Arrowhead Village?


“Have some more chicken, have some more pie, it don’t matter if it’s broiled or fried, just eat it, eat it, eat it…”


And how about Arby’s? There’s nothing else like it on the mountain, and I just love their roast beef sandwiches smothered in Arby’s signature barbecue sauce. And, how about those potato cakes, apple turnovers and jamocha shakes? Mmmmm!


“You’re playing with your food like it’s some kind of game. Now, if you starve to death, you’ll just have yourself to blame, so eat it, just eat it…burp.”


Keep it flyin’, Uncle Mott