I’m stuck in a marriage from hell. I was single for a long time. The kids are grown and gone. I own my home. I have a decent job. So what do I go and do? I get swept off my feet by a wheeler-dealer I met on Facebook.
Just like that, snap, there are three huge smelly mutts sharing our bed, my yard is now a used car lot, not to mention the greasy motorcycle parts, the leaky kayaks and stacks of old tires. I have no idea where he gets all this stuff, but he resells it boldly on Facebook. Facebook is the curse of the 21st century!
And, of course, the dog poop is never picked up; it’s everywhere.
Thank goodness I go to work five days a week down the hill or I’d go bat crazy.
He is unable to keep a commitment. He makes promises he can’t keep. I’m embarrassed to be out with him, as he has conned so many people. He is quite the liar.
I’ve thrown him out several times but, each time I do, he childishly posts poor-me rants on Facebook and I end up with hundreds of posts ganging up on me. He gets the crowd so choked up and in tears to the point that even my mother insists that I take him back, and she can’t stand the guy.
Any advice on how to turn this thing around? He really can be a sweetie. He’s in terrific physical shape and he seems to pretty much adore me.
Junk Yard Wife in Crestline
Dear Junk Yard Wife,
I’m just assuming, but didn’t his tattooed sleeves and neck give you a bit of a clue?
Promise me that you will never ever give over any type of ownership of your home to this slug.
(Why do I never hear from men who have fallen prey to a female wheeler-dealer? Perhaps, they are ashamed to admit that mistake.)
He’s got it real sweet. I believe an ultimatum is in order: Get the dogs off our bed, clean up their poop, remove any and all resale junk from the yard, and do what you say you’re going to do! If he refuses to comply, file for the you-know-what and get yourself a restraining order.
Unless he’s a really terrific bedroom partner, you may just have to bite the bullet on this one and leave the relationship with your head held high.
By the way, is there a dune buggy on your property that I can get cheap?
Sidney
Send your questions for Sidney to Sidney@thealpinemountaineer.com or by snail mail to Dear Sidney, The Alpine Mountaineer, P.O. Box 4572, Crestline, CA 92325.
This advice is intended for entertainment purposes only. No animals were harmed in the writing of this column.
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