I don’t know about you, but I’ve been getting some very strange phone calls of late, dozens of calls every cotton-pickin’ day, many of which have no one there to talk to. I call them “ghost calls.” I beg them to say something, anything. It’s really annoying when they call at 5 a.m.
Operator, oh let’s forget about this call, there’s no one there I really wanted to talk to, thank you for your time. Oh, you’ve been so much more than kind, you can keep the dime. (“Operator” Jim Croce – 1972)
I get calls all the time from people who ask, “Can you hear me?” I always say, “No!” This is what I like to call a “scam call.” You never want to say, “Yes” because they can record your voice and use it to empty your bank account. I get calls all the time from Lisa at Spectrum. This so-called Lisa is actually a robot who wants me to press 1 to talk to an operator. Never ever press 1 to talk to a so-called operator who wants to give you a discount or upgrade your service.
This is the kiss of death because they will ask for your credit card or Social Security number and bank routing number. Never ever do this! In the first place, just hang up on them before you get transferred to a so-called operator. Oh, by the way, I don’t have telephone service from Spectrum.
I also get calls all day long from someone with a whiny voice named Michael who says he’s from “your telephone service.” Michael, who’s probably calling from a phone bank in Bangladesh, also likes to call when I’m sleeping. Then there’s the calls I get all day long from someone who wants to buy my house or one of my rental properties. I tell them they are all lived in or rented and they’re not for sale. At least they don’t call in the middle of the night like some others do.
OK, so here’s the other problem: I do have phone service from Frontier Communications, like many other folks on the mountain. The problem lately is that my landline phone does not work most of the time and, when it does, it makes a crackling noise. I have called them to complain, but still no response. The latest from the rumor mill is that someone has stolen their fiber-optic cable, which I never opted for in the first place. I could just scream… “Eeeeeeyoooowwwww!!!! There, I feel better now!
But isn’t that the way they say it goes? Well, let’s forget all that and give me the number if you can find it, so I can call just to tell ‘em I’m fine, and to show I’ve overcome the blow.
Keep it flyin,’
Uncle Mott







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