This past week, I closed an escrow where I represented the seller. It was a difficult transaction. At seemingly every turn there was another unusual request, another delay or another issue that made an already complicated process harder than it needed to be.
Interestingly, the buyer’s agent and I weren’t the problem. We remained professional throughout the transaction, and I think she was every bit as exasperated by some of the twists and turns as I was.
It wasn’t until closing, when she came to my office to pick up the keys, that everything finally clicked.
Her clients seemed to approach the transaction believing collaboration and cooperation would somehow put them at a disadvantage. If they treated my seller and me as “the enemy,” they believed they were more likely to win concessions.
But a real estate transaction doesn’t need a winner and a loser.
There is an important distinction here between fiduciary duty, fair and honest dealing, and negotiation.
As agents, our fiduciary responsibility is to our own clients. I represented the seller. The other agent represented the buyer. We each had a duty to advocate for our respective client’s interests, protect their position and negotiate on their behalf.
That doesn’t require us to be adversaries.
We can advocate fiercely for our clients while still dealing professionally and honestly with the other side. In fact, experienced agents do this every day. We can disagree about price, repairs, credits, timelines or contract terms without turning those disagreements into personal battles.
Negotiation is something else entirely. Negotiation means asking for what you want while recognizing that the other party has the right to say no. Sometimes there is room for compromise. Sometimes there isn’t.
And ultimately, the contract governs the transaction, not emotion.
Creating conflict doesn’t magically create additional contractual rights. Being angry doesn’t change a contingency period. Applying pressure doesn’t automatically obligate another party to make a concession. When everyone understands the agreement and their respective rights and responsibilities, many disagreements become much easier to navigate.
Buying or selling a home is stressful enough without deliberately turning the people on the other side into opponents.
There will absolutely be moments when interests conflict. A buyer wants a lower price while a seller wants a higher one. One party may want a repair or credit the other doesn’t want to give. That is normal negotiation.
But the person across the table doesn’t have to become the enemy simply because they want something different.
Some of the smoothest transactions I’ve handled involved tough negotiators on both sides. Everyone advocated for their client, everyone understood the contract and everyone remained professional.
The goal isn’t for one side to defeat the other.
The goal is to successfully close the transaction both parties agreed to enter.
Theresa Grant is a real estate broker and columnist covering Lake Arrowhead, Crestline, Running Springs, and the surrounding mountain communities. Reach her at (909) 442-1345 visit www.HomesInLakeArrowhead.com, and follow her on social media @TheresaGrantRealtor. Theresa is a Broker Associate with REAL Broker Technologies. DRE#01202881.
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