Dear Sidney

Jan 18, 2023 | Dear Sidney

Dear Sidney,
Happy New Year to you!
I fear that I have been re-gifted, if there is such a word. It was a kind gesture, dropping by with a festive green and red bag stuffed with sparkling white tissue paper. I thanked my neighbor and took the welcomed surprise inside. I was enjoying Christmas day alone with my old dog and a big fire, even though the weather was relatively warm.
Inside the gift bag were three perfectly frosted sugar cookies wrapped in cellophane and tied up in a satin green ribbon. Familiarity shook its ugly head. Sure as shooting, these were the very same cookies I baked and left on my neighbor’s front porch Christmas Day 2021. She didn’t even try to disguise them by using a different bag. Should I share my disgust or just keep my mouth shut?

Disappointed in Cedarpines Park

Dear Disappointed,
The big question on my mind: DID YOU EAT THEM? If you enjoyed them on Christmas Day 2022, the one-year-old cookies obviously didn’t fatally harm you or you wouldn’t be writing to me in January 2023. So many options here as to how to wisely answer your question without causing neighborhood discord.
(1) If you did not eat them, save the gift bag and tissue, and freeze the cookies and cellophane in a food saver. They’ll be even more delicious next Christmas when you re-gift and have the last word.
(2) If you tossed the whole megillah into the trash, buck up and shut up.
(3) If you did eat them while sipping on your brandy, drop off a thank you note letting your neighbor know just how scrumptious those perfectly delicious cookies were and that, certainly, they were baked by an angel sent from heaven.
Whatever you do, be charitable. It’s obvious to me that your neighbor has a screw loose.

Sidney

Send your questions for Sidney to [email protected] or by snail mail to Dear Sidney, The Alpine Mountaineer, P.O. Box 4572, Crestline, CA 92325.
This advice is intended for entertainment purposes only. No animals were harmed in the writing of this column.

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