After battling with Nestlé Corp. (Arrowhead Drinking Water, now mega-conglomerate Blue Triton Brands) over its unauthorized practice of taking spring water from Strawberry Creek and neighboring Arrowhead Springs, Dr. Hugh Bialecki (Doctor of Medicine in Dentistry & DGD Darn Good Dentist) finds himself, once again, trying to persuade the U.S. Forest Service to enforce its own regulations banning the withdrawal of groundwater from Strawberry Creek, since Nestlé’s permit to do so expired 30 years ago.
This obviously illegal diversion of groundwater (60 million gallons a year for the past 50 years) is causing irreparable damage to our forest flora and fauna (that’s trees and wildlife for those of you educated in San Bernardino schools). Sheesh, and I thought Edison’s massive removal of trees from our forest was bad (see last week’s paper). Man, times are so tough it’s enough to make a grown man cry and we need to do something to bridge the gap!
When you’re weary, feeling small when tears are in your eyes, I’ll dry them all. I’m on your side, oh, when times get tough and friends just can’t be found, like a bridge over troubled water, I will lay me down. (“Bridge Over Troubled Water” – Simon & Garfunkel – 1970)
Those goldarned Blue Triton guys, with their estimated $10 billion yearly income, have a lot of goldarned gol to file a cease-and-desist order against the California State Water Resources Board which demands that they discontinue their illegal pillaging of our forest.
Well, as it turns out Blue Triton… and what a dumb name for a corporation – Triton, a son of Poseidon, a mollusk demigod who lives at the bottom of the sea and has the power to calm the waves by blowing a magical conch shell. Perhaps the demigod mollusk should be forced to blow all of our purloined water back into our local aquifer.
Well, as I was about to say, the big Mollusk is scheduled to appear in Fresno Superior Court sometime in March to try to overturn the State Water Board’s cease-and-desist order. I figure he will say something dumb like, “I didn’t do anything wrong.” Which reminds me, by the time you read this, the primary election will have already occurred. I hope you remembered to vote. As for me, I’m voting for Pedro.
Sail on silver girl, sail on by, your time has come to shine. All your dreams are on their way, see how they shine. Oh, if you need a friend I’m sailing right behind. Like a bridge over troubled water, I will ease your mind.
Keep it flyin’,
Uncle Mott
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